Here’s what happened, as simply and as contrastingly as I can put it. Aside from my very obvious heterosexual tendencies, I really love women, they’re honest and are much more likely to tell you exactly what they feel about something, of course this is not pretty when you’re being told you’re a bastard as a relationship ends but hey you can’t have it all your own way!
There’s this “understanding” within our society that women are over-emotional but I have found them not to be, men are actually under-emotional and this causes them to see women in a very narrowed down static tone, while I can see this and I know it’s fact I cannot always apply it and I still find I have to review myself, when faced with a woman with whom I have become emotionally involved.
I spoke with two women of different backgrounds about my work, I am impressed when women like my work because I believe them, when men like my work I think they’re up to something. I was chatting with someone and explained to her that my work was changing, that I was using less bad language, but that it wasn’t completely intentional she said “That’s a shame, I like it, it makes your work real.” a short time later I was talking with another female and she seemed interested in the fact that I wrote I sent her some links and she checked it out and got back to me saying “I am not a fan of the swearing but all other parts I liked.”
I myself have no dilemma here whatsoever. I don’t write for anyone other than myself and I make no excuses for my work everything I have ever written was executed from the point of view of exactly how I felt at the time. I have never tried to hide my emotions. Men and women are not fundamentally different the differences lie within society and how we are brought up, gender profiling is very real and since it has been happening for generations we end up with a world as it is today where women and men feel different from one another, act different from one another and play different from one another. Sexism is just as real as racism, just as real as any form of intolerance but it has become so normal now that we don’t realise how it effects us all day to day. Men and women actually believe that they really are different from one another, socially different I mean, biological differences are superficial in comparison to these social aspects I am trying to highlight.
Language has became a very powerful thing in the modern age but I also feel it has too much power. I cannot hurt anyone with words but I can hurt their feelings, this is a clear indication that we have grown sensitive to words and when you’re sensitive to words in a world full of confusion and lies you are in effect just leaving yourself open to attack. Most of us live on our intentions we have come to believe that if we say we’re going to do good that that is enough but it isn’t. Most of us want to do things which we never achieve because we’re either too busy or too lazy so we just sit back and make the excuse, well I am not a bad person and that becomes enough, but it isn’t.
So some people like swearing and some people don’t, simple eh? No, not so simple. How we express ourselves is not wholly dependant on us as individuals, expression is a social aspect of our instincts. I have noted that I am much more likely to swear and talk about sex when I am speaking with men of course I am not fully aware of this at the time. People are not always honest about their expression most people only express either what they think they can get away with or what they think others want to hear or in other cases what they steadfastly believe to be right.
Generally it is taken for granted that women don’t like swearing but my example of real life has shown this is not entirely true, women are subject to the same constraints and conditions that men are but because women are the homemakers and teachers of the next generations (not entirely true either!) much more is expected of them. Women who digress into alcoholism and drug addiction are viewed horribly in comparison to men who do exactly the same, and worse, because women are expected to do their best in really bad circumstances. The really unfortunate thing is that it is often other women who are the worst critics of their sisters and that is of course due to our love of competition, but that’s a whole other story.